Granted, today he'd be in his 80's, but Holden Caulfield's take on women throughout Catcher in the Rye is honest and absolutely hysterical.
Here's a passage I was reading recently and thought you might get a kick out of it - Holden talking about gettin' it on:
The thing is, most of the time when you're coming pretty close to doing it with a girl - a girl that isn't a prostitute or anything, I mean - she keeps telling you to stop. The trouble with me is, I stop. Most guys don't. I can't help it. You never know when they really want you to stop, or whether they're just scared as hell, or whether they're just telling you to stop so that if you do go through with it, the blame'll be on you, not them. Anyway, I keep stopping. The trouble is, I get to feeling sorry for them. I mean most girls are so dumb and all. After you neck them for a while, you can really watch them lose their brains. You take a girl when she really gets passionate, she just hasn't any brains. I don't know. They tell me to stop, so I stop. I always wish I hadn't, after I take them home, but I keep doing it anyway.
Salinger, J.D. The Catcher in the Rye. Boston: Little, Brown and Company, 1951